Tradition (if that exists with dating apps) dictates that it’s common practice to exchange several messages over several days or even weeks with someone before agreeing to meet in person. However, there is an emerging trend of people deciding to meet without any messaging beforehand. While it may seem counterintuitive, there are actually several benefits to this approach.
Indeed, Findingtheone.com recently conducted a poll* and found that 70% of respondents would meet a match without messaging beforehand. In this blog post, we will explore some of the benefits of meeting someone from a dating app without messaging beforehand.
- More Authentic First Impressions
When you engage in messaging before meeting, there is often a level of performance involved. People present the best versions of themselves, carefully crafting each response to ensure they put their best foot forward. But when you meet someone without messaging beforehand, you get to experience their true personality from the very beginning. There’s no filter, no carefully crafted responses, just the raw, unfiltered essence of who they are. This can give you a much better sense of whether or not you’re compatible, without the risk of being misled by a false persona. Put simply it’s a more authentic first impression!
- Reduced Expectations
Another benefit of meeting someone without messaging beforehand is that it can reduce expectations. When you engage in prolonged messaging before meeting, it’s easy to build up a mental image of who they are and what they’re like. This can lead to unrealistic expectations, which are difficult for the other person to live up to. But when you meet someone without messaging beforehand, you have fewer preconceived notions about who they are. You’re more open to whatever may come, and this can make the experience of meeting them more relaxed and enjoyable.
- Increased Excitement
Of course, meeting someone ‘blind’ can also increase the excitement of the experience. There’s a certain thrill that comes with meeting someone for the first time, without any prior communication. You have no idea what to expect, and there’s a sense of adventure and spontaneity that can be very exciting. It can be a bit nerve-wracking, but it can also be a lot of fun.
- Better Communication Skills
When you meet someone without messaging beforehand, you are forced to rely on your communication skills in real-time. You have to be able to carry a conversation and make a good impression without the benefit of being able to carefully craft your responses. This can be a bit intimidating, but it can also be a valuable learning experience. Meeting someone without messaging beforehand can help you improve your communication skills and become more comfortable in social situations.
- More Time-Efficient
Another benefit of meeting someone without messaging beforehand is that it can be more time-efficient. When you exchange messages with someone for a while before meeting, it can be easy to fall into the trap of over-analyzing and overthinking. This can lead to a lot of wasted time and energy. When you meet someone without messaging beforehand, you can quickly determine whether or not there is a spark between you. If there isn’t, you can move on to the next potential match without wasting any more time.
- Increased Safety
And let’s not forget about safety. Safety is always a concern when it comes to online dating. When you engage in prolonged messaging before meeting, it’s easy to let your guard down and become too comfortable. But when you meet someone without messaging beforehand, you’re forced to rely on your instincts and assess the situation in real-time. This can be a safer approach because you’re less likely to ignore warning signs or red flags.
- More Fun
Last but not least, meeting someone without messaging beforehand can simply be more fun. It can be a unique and exciting experience that you’ll remember for a long time. There’s a certain magic that comes with meeting someone for the first time and getting to know them in person. When you meet someone without messaging beforehand, you get to experience this magic in a more pure and unfiltered way.
I know what some of you might be thinking, ” isn’t it risky to meet someone without knowing anything about them beforehand?” Of course, you should always exercise caution when meeting someone from a dating app, regardless of whether or not you’ve messaged them beforehand. It’s important to take precautions, such as meeting in a public place and letting a friend know where you’re going. But that being said, there are many benefits to meeting someone without messaging beforehand, as we’ve just discussed.
Of course, there are also potential drawbacks to meeting someone without messaging beforehand. For one, you may find that there’s no chemistry between you and the other person, and that can be disappointing. Additionally, there’s always the risk of meeting someone who doesn’t have the best intentions. But these risks are present in any form of dating, whether it’s through a dating app or through more traditional means.
It’s important to note that this post highlights the many benefits of meeting blind and I’m not suggesting you have zero messages before meeting. In reality you can’t organise the date without messaging but keep it simple and short. Tick off a couple of things, location, red flags etc then propose the date. Meeting someone without messaging beforehand can be a unique and rewarding experience. It can lead to more authentic first impressions, reduce expectations, increase excitement, improve communication skills, and be more time-efficient. It can also be a safer approach because you’re less likely to let your guard down. And, of course, it can simply be more fun.
So if you’re feeling adventurous, why not give it a try? Who knows, you might just meet the love of your life!
* Survey conducted in October 2022 using PollFish. Respondents were self-identified as single and having used dating apps within the last 12 months.